A Letter to My Son on his Third Birthday

My Beloved Son,

Today you turn three years old! I have watched you grow for 3 years and am constantly in awe of you. Your creativity and imagination have grown, as has your capacity for empathy. Watching you explore and learn has been the highlight of my life. It has been my job to encourage and direct you and that job brings me nothing but joy.

This past year has been full of transitions. We bought a house and moved to a small town that is completely different from where you were born. As a result of this move, I have had the joy of watching you learn from nature and the outdoors. We have built a life here and you have made friends. I have seen you worry about your friends when they get upset, displaying your amazing capacity for empathy. You get excited to see them and every time you do, my heart bursts with love for you.

Also this year, you became a big brother! In this adventure, you have exceeded my wildest dreams. You are the most amazing brother, always eager to help me when I need it. There are hugs and kisses and cuddles galore. I’ve had the joy of watching your love for your baby brother grow and develop into a true bond.

Three years ago, I met you for the first time. People told me that I would be overcome with joy and love when you were born. To be honest with you, son, this was not my experience. However, over the course of your first few hours and days of life, my heart grew in ways I never knew possible. I learned a type of love that had previously been a mystery to me. Holding your tiny body to my breast, I learned what it meant to be a mother.

Over the last three years, you have changed so much. Now, you are independent, strong-willed, and full of love. While you often drive me crazy, the beautiful moments when you hug me out of nowhere are sprinkled throughout our days. Being your mother is a roller coaster of emotions but I know that the aspects of your personality that cause me frustration now will help you grow into an amazing, strong adult (I’m talking about that STRONG will of yours).

I see so much of myself (and your father) in you. This is both beautiful and often maddening! It is crazy how difficult it can be to see yourself mirrored in your child. One of the hardest things about being a biological parent is dealing with the less desirable aspects of yourself reflected back at you in your children.

As you grow, I have also seen you morph into more of your own individual. You have taken these personality traits from your father and me and made them into your own. You have taught me so much about myself through watching you and through watching myself as your mother.

Over these three years, you have shown me my own strength. I have learned how fiercely protective I can be. My patience has been tested and has grown along with you. Through your eyes, I have rediscovered beauty in the world and in myself. Thank you for showing me wonder and joy as I have never known.

Today you turn three and I continue to love you more and more every day.

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